The Ready For Polyamory Podcast

Season 6 Episode 7: Abuse in Polyamory Part 1

March 16th, 2023

Content Warning: throughout this episode, we speak frankly of forms of emotional, financial, and physical abuse. There is no particularly graphic content and the episode is "safe for work" in a traditional sense, but it may be triggering to some listeners and begins with a similar audio content warning. Listen at a time and in a place when you have the capacity to care for yourself, especially if you are a survivor of abuse.

"There are several conversations our community should be having about abuse but the first step should be to acknowledge it happens in polyamorous relationships."

"Mainstream polyamorous discourse is simply not trauma-informed and therefore is mostly ridiculous. It ignores people's reality and becomes a richer tool for abusers."

In this episode, Laura sits down with Alicia Bunyan-Sampson, of Polyamorous Black Girl, to discuss abuse in polyamorous relationships and the conversations the polyam community needs to be having around this challenging topic. They go over the ways the polyam community's wider conversation fails survivors by implying that polyamory is "more enlightened" than monogamy; the ways being a subculture can begin the work of isolating a victim for an abuser; the fact that there is no such thing as a "perfect victim" and that this complicates public perception of abuse; some conversations the community needs to have more often; and more.

You can find a listing of all Alicia's websites and social media at, but she is frequently posting on instagram @polyamorousblackgirl on tiktok @polyamorousblkgrl and on twitter @polyamblackgirl.

As always you can find Laura and Ready for Polyamory at and the full links to all her social media and upcoming projects at